Who is that rising in you? How many wafers did you eat last Sunday?

Someone who I’ve never met, the sister of a friend of mine, sent me the following message today. (It should be noted that in Ugandan SMS culture it’s commonplace to find lengthy, pensive text messages):

"Do u know dat christ’s death wasnt easy at al, he was beaten nd tortured, denied aplace among his pple, pple spitted on him, every sort of evil word was said nd al sorts of accuzations were made, BUT WHY? bse he saw it worthy 2 save me nd u, indeed his death wasnt easy bt it was worthy. Christ paid d price, lets be glad nd rejoice 4 we a free indeed. Happy easter may d risen christ rise in u too."

A couple weeks ago in Apac I participated in the following exchange with Robert, a young Ugandan and fellow mosquito-catcher. I had wondered out loud why all the pictures of Jesus in the restaurant where we were eating portrayed Our Lord and Savior as if he were from Norway.

Me: “I was raised in a secular household. We didn’t go to church.”
Him: “In America? There are secular people in America?”
Me: “Yeah, there are a lot.”
Him: “Like 10,000 or 20,000?”
Me: “Probably more like 50 million.”
Him: “In America? But there are so many missionaries that come here!”
Me: “Yeah…”

Photos from round two in Apac:
http://picasaweb.google.com/john.quattrochi/ApacOyam2

"Let there be IKEA."

"No, Officer, I don't smell anything."

We returned to Kampala just as Mummar Gadaffi, Libya’s dictator for the last 40 years, was inaugurating the huge ultramodern mosque that he paid for, the humbly-named Gadaffi National Mosque. While in town he also delivered a lengthy speech in which he called Yoweri Museveni and Robert Mugabe “true African revolutionaries”, and urged them to never retire. He went on to say that a constitution is “just a piece of paper” and what’s important is “the will of the people” (which has nothing to do with how they vote). As the cherry on top of his self-serving cupcake, he claimed that someone had deleted the name of Prophet Muhammad from the text of the Bible and as such the Book is a forgery and the genuine Bible needs to be found.

http://www.monitor.co.ug/artman/publish/sun_news/Gadaffi_ignorant.shtml

Honkies are being recruited to smuggle drugs in and out of Kampala. Did someone say supplemental grant writing?
http://www.monitor.co.ug/artman/publish/insights/How_K_la_has_become_a_drug_lord_s_paradise.shtml

"Smoking or chewing Marijuana is the main cause of mental disorders which are soaring at an alarmingly high rate in the country."
Yes, and masturbation makes hair grow on your palms.
http://www.monitor.co.ug/artman/publish/news/Uganda_leads_in_marijuana_growing.shtml

The War On Drugs: another fine American example for the world to follow.
http://www.monitor.co.ug/artman/publish/oped/Uganda_must_take_drug_trade_seriously.shtml